Feeling:honestly? kinda sad
Song:ride~the vines

well, wednesday night i did the unthinkable, what i thought i would never be capable of doing. i told someone off, was brutally honest with them, and now i don't know how to feel. most of me felt really bad. i mean, really bad. i actually knelt down and prayed to God that i was still a good person, that doing what i did didn't warrant a trip to hell. i overreacted, maybe. doesn't change the fact that i hurt their feelings when they've never done anything to me. that's what makes it even worse. i don't know.

liza and i talked last nite, and part of the conversation was about hooking up with just a random person. it pretty much came down to the realization that i will never be able to just have a little fling with someone, be it just a kiss or spending the night. it's not me. i have no respect for the guys that do that kind of stuff, or the girls that let them. or vice versa for all it matters. also, the more i talk to liza, the more i realize i truly do love her, especially after the fact that josh said i should cut down on talking to her seeing as how we're just friends and shouldn't talk as much as we do. i now know that that's humanly impossible for me to do. i couldn't imagine telling liza to stop calling me so often. it'd be like telling...i'm at a loss for words. you know what i mean.

i think i need to go play basketball now.